I think I've found my reward for 50lbs lost

At the beginning of this journey, I told myself that I would get a nice reward for 50lbs lost.  I wanted it to be something that added life and would help with the next part of my journey.  Well, I think I've found it.  It's a Diamond Back Mountain Bike.  From what I have read it is a good entry level bike that can be used for light off road and road use.  I could really see myself getting way in to biking again.  Now.....just to fit it into the budget....does this count as an emergency?  HAHA

At this point we would rather just start the fast, but we already had everything set up to start on Monday.  I will also be posting to a video journal and will occasionally link it to this blog.  I hope you enjoy.  Let me know what you think!

Okay, I did it! I'm still shaking!

I did it!  I almost can't believe it myself.  I posted a link to my blog on Facebook.  Many of you might be here because of that link.  Part of my plan to totally change the way I look at myself and at the world around me, is to be open and honest with those I encounter.  So on this blog, I am laying it out there.  I am exposing the truth....all of it!  I hope you all will follow the blog and send me words of encouragement along the way.  This was a huge step for me.  I am hoping it all doesn't backfire, but I have to begin to tear down the facade and be real!  This is about as real as it gets!!!

The blog title...Change now or die...

My wife says its sounds a little harsh. I contemplated renaming it, but decided to keep it because those words are the driving force behind this entire project. This past few year has been a time of recognizing mortality for the first time, really. It started with the passing of my Dad at the age of 59... Way too young! The typical heart disease, blood pressure, congestive heart failure that is becoming more and more prevalent in this country, stole his life. There are so many factors that play into this...we will save that for another post. Like I was saying, I have really started to come to face with my own mortality. As mentioned my father passed. A good friend went to bed after celebrating a birthday and never woke up. His heart exploded in his chest. No drugs, no alcohol, just stopped working, tried to revive itself and misfired. He left a wife and two kids. Another relative diagnosed with Dibetes type II, another diagnosed with Cancer, another with Irritable Bowel Syndrome, another with depression and anxiety.....the list goes on. I've been heavy for quite awhile, but until recently, the weight was my only symptom. Then, I started having sleeping problems. I regularly slept less than three hours a night. Then came prescription #1 for Ambien. My bloodwork was starting to show things changing too. Cholesterol was creeping up, hormone levels were sliding to places they weren't meant to be. Hormone changes led to depression and anxiety... pills #2 and #3...Wellbutrin and Xannax. More tests showed that my thyroid levels were way off too. Make that pill #4...Levothyroxine. And those are just prescription medications. I also frequently pop over the counter remedies that include Tylenol, ibuprofen, acid reducers for reflux, stool softeners and laxatives. I've also come to require multiple cups of coffee just to keep it going throughout the day. These all just snook up on me. Years of neglect and abuse to my own body has now brought it to a place of dependence just to perform. This is not okay for a man of 36. This cannot be kept up for an unlimited number of years. As I started to realize this, I found myself regularly saying to myself..."Change now or die! Change now or die, change now or die"
On the pages of this blog, I will describe my plan to take action and begin to regain control of my body, my mind and my spirit. I will also post abut the struggles and victories along the way. I hope you will follow along and send words of encouragement as I endeavour to completely change the way I look at the world and I look at myself.